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June 1st - 2 min read
Talk Therapy Blog
Why Emotional Intelligence Matters?
![heart, mind, emotional intelligence](https://talktherapywithvera.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/10/heart-mind-emotional-intelligence-4682762.jpg)
Emotional intelligence refers to emotional quotient (EQ), and it’s the ability to identify and manage yours and others’ emotions.
Below are the four types of emotional intelligence:
- Self-awareness: identify and understand your feelings; understand the effects of your strength and weakness and be confident in yourself;
- Self-management: control and express your emotions in appropriate settings; self-motivated; and have a positive outlook in your life;
- Social awareness: form a meaningful connection with others while understanding and acknowledging their emotions;
- Relationship management: work well in team settings; help others to develop their skills; and ability to handle conflicts
These are very important as they will help you to develop and maintain your professional and personal growth.
I remember when I lacked in some of these emotional intelligence components, and it affected both my personal and professional life. I didn’t understand why I acted in such manners that would often get me in trouble, or why people didn’t realize who I truly am. For me, developing these skills wasn’t easy because nobody talked about feelings openly in my family when I was a child. When I became older, I always questioned myself, “Is there something wrong with me? How can I develop these skills better?”
I’m going to share how I improve my emotional intelligence and remember this is a lifelong process.
- Set aside 5 minutes of your day to reconnect with your feelings. Pay attention to the feeling of physical sensation in your body and notice what the sensation is;
- Ability to take responsibility for your feelings by accepting this is how you feel and behave as it can lead to a positive impact in your life;
- Know what triggers your emotions by taking time to process before communicating;
- It’s up to you whether you want to react in a situation by either over-reacting or remaining calm;
- Don’t forget to ask for help when you need it as it’s a way to motivate you to become better and vice versa;
- Remember it’s not what you say but how you say it through nonverbal communication (ex: body language, tone, etc.) because it’ll affect how others’ view of you;
- Psychologist – Daniel Goleman, recommended to observe someone you know who is good at a particular skill in social settings, watch how he/she acts and control his/her emotions, then implement and apply that knowledge to yourself.